Life as a medium... I am sitting here thinking about my life and what it would be like to have a normal 9-5 job, wake up at 6am and head into the city for work. I can't even picture it, honestly. First off, I am far from a morning person (don't wake the bear), I don't drink coffee so I would be a MISERABLE son of a bitch....which would turn me into a raging lunatic in traffic which would most definitely lead to my middle finger becoming permanately stuck up in the air. And lastly, I don't like being told what to do. I have many reasons to thank God.
Instead, I have the honor of helping people release their grief. I am beyond incredibly blessed to have the gift I have. I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life the past year in many aspects. The one thing I never did EVER was accept and realize how powerful my gift is. And I don't mean that in a cocky way- cocky is not my essence- I mean in a way that it changes lives and I wasn't accepting "thank yous". Of course I have received amazing, heartfelt messages such as, " You have changed my life..." "I finally can get out of bed knowing I will see my loved ones again..." "Your gift is amazing and has given me great comfort..." the list goes on. I have always thought, how sweet those messages were but I would never allow myself to accept the love.
I believed that during each reading I gave, even if I gave my all AND it was the most incredible reading- I thought I could have given MORE. Said MORE. Validated MORE.... more, more, more. That is until I finally went to a psychic mentalist who made me realize beyond more.
To be honest, I never wanted to go see other mediums or psychics- not out of disrespect but because IT FREAKED ME OUT. YES! Freaked me out! I give those credit who come to my shows because I can relate to the nervous butterflies in your stomach. I was afraid of being told things from another realm. I KNOW CRAZY. Don't judge me. LOL
That is until I decided to take more LEAPS and just fucking do it! For over a year now my friend Steph and I have been saying let's go see Jon Stetson! (an incredible psychic mentalist). I noticed his last show was at Uplifting Connections in Bridgewater and he would be out of the country until 2015. We must go.
That night we were able to write down a question that we did not know the answer to on a piece of paper. It was folded up with ONLY my intials written on the front. When he picked mine, he asked, "Who is C.D.?". I raised my hand hesitantly. He already knew my question without opening the the folded piece of paper with my question inside. My question was a smidge personal but had nothing to do with my gift. As he looked at me he said, "..... beside your question, I have to tell you- you have an incredible gift...I can see it... Your gift is so powerful. But you give and give and you give and you think you aren't good enough... you have to start trusting yourself and realize how amazing you are. You are good enough."
I was balling my eyes out. Infront of a crowd.
Candace. Doesn't. Cry. Infront. Of. Crowds.
Although I had asked another question- which was answered- I was given another answer that I know universe needed me to know.... I think that once I accepted that I am good enough within my gift that crazily it would help me understand that I was good enough for my orginial question. Everything made sense that night. Since then, I went back into a lot of old emails, testimonials, Facebook messages and posts going back to 2010-2011 and let me tell you..... I finally accepted the love.
Since that day at Jon's show- my connections to Spirit during my shows have been incredible because I have finally accepted that even ONE small validation can change someone's world. Jon's "small" validation was SO huge.
My mother always says, " Sometimes it's not always the biggest present wrapped that looks like the best yet, it's the smallest one that is the biggest." Thank you Jon for helping me close old doors, open a new ones and accept. Forever grateful!
Be good to yourself. Love yourself. Post soon my people,
(Beyonce....I love you)